As most of my regular readers know, I'm a huge fan of Twitter. It's become a huge source of entertainment for myself thanks to the large amount of folks on there. I follow quite a few folks, but none more funny than the excellent JackFacts24. JackFacts24's posts are all about how tough, unstoppable, and determined Jack Bauer from the FOX TV series 24 is over the course of the series. I thought about doing the interview via Twitter, but Twitter limits you to 140 characters, so I figured it would be nice give JackFacts24 as many characters as he needed. I had a blast coming up with the questions for this interview as well as reading JackFacts responses. Enjoy!!!
Before the interview begins, here are a few of my favorite lines from JackFacts24.
Jack Bauer does not let women get on top during sex. Why? Because Jack Bauer never fucks up. #24
Jack Bauer is what Willis was talking about. #24
Only Jack Bauer can shoot a woman in the neck, bury her alive, and then make her fall in love with him later that day. #24
Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.
Jack Bauer always wanted to say, "Igiveyoumyworddammitwe'rerunningoutoftimesonofabitch" but if he did, fans would die of emotion. #24
I decided I'd like to give blog readers a look inside the mind of
JackFacts24 since I often wondered aloud, where in the hell he came up with stuff. Below is the interview.
1. When did you start doing the Jack Facts?
I started in mid-January, a couple days after the season premiere. I remembered reading Jack Bauer facts years ago laughing my ass off to those things. So I thought it'd be a cool idea if I could get updates on Twitter (NothingForX) but all I found were a bunch of Jack Bauers...Baurie...Baueries(?). So I mentioned it to a friend and she said she'd totally follow a Jack fact profile, and that's when I decided I should start one up. (I did end up finding another Jack fact Twitter profile, but it wasn't as funny as it could be.) So I went right to work, started scouring the Internet for some and got everything set up and I've been going strong gaining followers and lots of re-tweets. It's nice to see '24' fans spread the word about their favorite hero.
2. What are your favorites Jack Facts?
My favorites? Damn. There are so many that popped into my head right now. My favorites tend to be the ones with good imagery behind them. Where you can actually see Jack doing those ridiculous things or picturing the scenario. You'll see what I mean below. I know I could go on for a while, but I'll limit myself to just 5:
1) The giraffe first came into existence when Jack Bauer uppercutted a horse.
2) The THX sound demo comes from Jack Bauer waking up in the morning.
3) Michelle once cheated on Tony with Jack. When Tony found out, he went over to Michelle and gave her a pat on the ass.
4) If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12."
5) When Pres. Palmer started doing Allstate advertisements, it took 43 takes before he could stop saying, "You're in good hands with Jack Bauer."
6) If Jack Bauer tells you to get out of the room because you don't want to see what he's about to do you better stay your ass in there 'cause you're about to witness the most shockingly awesome thing you've ever seen.
7) Jack Bauer has always wanted to say "I give you my word damn it we're running out of time son of a bitch," but if he ever said that, fans would just die of emotion.
8) The sound of Jack Bauer's voice can impregnate some women, and even some men.
9) After having sex with your wife, you need to apologize for not being Jack Bauer.
10) Jack Bauer doesn't have sperm; he ejaculates babies.
Okay, so that was 10. I couldn't help myself. Lol.
3. Where in the hell do you come up with these?
There's actually only a few that I've written myself. As I mentioned before, I read some of these years ago, but back then they were just recycled Chuck Norris facts. Now, people are coming up with these all the time. There are two sites that I know of where you can submit your own, but only one I like because there's a moderator, and he/she/it throws out the junk. So I go throughout the Internet and find more facts from all over and pick the one I think fans of '24' would really enjoy and tweet those. It's funny because when I look, I find my name attached to some of them.
4. How fast would Jack Bauer take care of Chuck Norris?
Quicker than Al Bundy.
5. What are your predictions for the end of Season 7?
I keep getting asked that question and it's so hard to tell. Will Jack die? Will Kim save him? Something I read made it possible for me to think that Jack could indeed die. It was the fact that next season could be a prequel, but if casting rumors are correct, it won't be. Currently, I think Tony's going to get away. That'd be a pretty great way to end the series after next season; finally killing him off. They really dragged Nina's exit out but it was SO satisfying to finally see her die after three seasons. I hope Renee and Jack end up together. Also, I'm pretty solid on the fact that President Taylor is going to keep CTU going after she see what good it can do. Overall, I'm fine with whatever happens in the show, just as long as Chase doesn't swing back into action and save the day. But I'm pretty sure none of us have to worry about that.
So there you have it, an interview with the premier Jack Bauer toughness expert on Twitter and probably the web. I hope you enjoyed it and please follow JackFacts24 on twitter. Whether you're a fan of 24 or just funny stuff, I guarantee you'll laugh several times a day. For anyone who's happened across the blog thanks to the interview, I invite you to read daily. I do quite a lot of content on 24, other TV shows, video games, and just general jackassery. Thanks for reading!!!
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